This has created millions of discontent, mediocre individuals that just sit on the sidelines and watch the world pass by. Yes, confidence, or rather the lack of confidence. Most people don’t realize just how important it is to have the confidence to achieve success. Self-confidence is the impetus that gets you going before you even begin to work on that important task or goal. Success and achieving goals boils down to figuring out what you’re made of and what drives you. If you don’t believe in yourself and you lack the confidence that you need to get up after a setback, then it is likely that you are going to give up before you even get started.
How to Beat the Confidence Monster?
Start with your thoughts. What you think affects your actions, and your actions ultimately affect your results. Start thinking kinder thoughts. There is a phrase that says that we are each our own worst critic, and most of the very true time. When you find yourself overwhelmed by the perception you have of yourself as being not good, then you have already sabotaged yourself. Most of the time these thoughts go unnoticed and just fly under the radar as background noise or fleeting thoughts. Instead, start to keep track of the negative things that you say to yourself. Don’t ignore these negative thoughts, for they have already left their negative imprint.
Once you recognize you are having a negative thought about yourself ask yourself why? Why am I thinking this way?
These negative thoughts usually are well-intentioned creations whose aim is to protect you from disappointment. However, as well-intentioned as they may be, they are ultimately not good for you. Once you recognize the negative though, begin by interrupting those negative thoughts with positive affirmations. Instead, ask yourself “What if?” What if I was able to achieve this (you fill in the blank). If you feel resistance start by making your response smaller to reduce resistance. Let me give you an example. If you wanted to run a marathon and every time you started to think about that you started saying to yourself, “but I never have done this,” or “I don’t think I can last.” Immediately ask yourself the smaller “what if?” questions. Like, “What if I were run a mile? a five-mile race? A 5K run? This process short-circuits the negative thoughts and gets you back on the positive track. The smaller “what ifs” serve as a rung on a ladder, that helps you climb towards your bigger goals.
You can overcome the negativity your bias. All you have to do is work hard to catch yourself when you’re having negative thoughts about yourself or your process or your progress and force yourself to ask the right questions. Think positively and acknowledge all of the hard work that you have done and this will help you continue to achieve your goals.
Beat the Confidence Monster with the Right Allies
The right allies can make a world of difference. Gaining confidence can be a lot harder if you are around other negative people, so try and make sure that you are doing everything that you can to surround yourself with positive people who believe that you can do anything that you set your mind to. Toxic people will try to bring you down and doubt yourself, but there is no law saying that you have to believe them.
Instead of spending time with people who drain you, meet these outside sources of negativity with a good sense of humour. Do not let them bring you down. Allow the comments to roll off of you like water and instead of focusing on the negative, focus on the good. At the very least minimize exposure to the negative influences. How far they bring you down is directly proportional to how much time you spend with them.
Develop your sense of humour and try focusing on things that you should be thankful for. This is another great way short circuit negative thoughts. Today, start focusing on the things that truly matter. When you fill your cup with positive thoughts you will find that there is very little room for the negative. Take time each day to be grateful for the little things that make you happy. Be thankful for the opportunities you have that others don’t.
The power truly is in your hands and your head. Fill your mind with the right thoughts, get around the right people, and ask yourself the right questions to propel you towards your goals. If you do this every day, the confidence monster does not stand a chance. Good luck!